Tech Support for Mouse Problems....

Ailuros · 04-22-01, 10:02 PM

Sally, maybe you still haven't solved the problem with your mouse. So feel free to fill us in and we'll see if anyone of us can help. Till then I honestly hope that you didn't do something like that:

Quote:

Tech Support: "Can I help you?"
Customer: "Yes, my mouse isn't working. It was working fine yesterday."
Tech Support: "Ok, what is it doing, or not doing?"
Customer: "Well, I have an arrow, but it doesn't move when I move the mouse."
Tech Support: "Have you cleaned it?"
Customer: "Yes, I dropped it into a five gallon bucket of water last night."
Tech Support: "You did what?"
Customer: "I opened the case and dropped it into a five gallon bucket of water and let it soak over night."
Tech Support: "Well, ma'am, I would have to say that is probably your problem."
Customer: "Nah, can't be! That won't hurt 'em as long as you let 'em dry out completely before you try to use 'em again!"
Tech Support: "Well, ma'am, that's not exactly the case..."
Customer: "Listen, that isn't the problem!"
Tech Support: "Ok, well...ma'am, I don't know what else to tell you except--"
Customer: "So you're telling me to buy a new mouse."
Tech Support: "I don't see anything else you can do."
Customer: (click)

[ 04-22-2001: Message edited by: ailuros21 ]

AMD-Tech · 04-22-01, 10:07 PM

lmao

Just wait till I drag out an old file of funny tech support stories! (as soon as I can find it)

Ailuros · 04-22-01, 10:13 PM

this can turn out interesting......

Quote:

]
Customer: "About time too. Are you a real person?"

Tech Support: "Yes sir, how can I help you?"

Customer: "I moved some stuff I don't use to the trash and deleted the trash, and now I'm getting all sorts of %&*#ing errors. What are you going to do about it? You've got an accent, haven't you?"

Tech Support: "Yes sir, I'm in Ireland."

It became apparent that the customer, in his wisdom, had destroyed the Windows registry and deleted just about everything he needed to run Windows.

Tech Support: "Sir, I believe we will have to reload your system with its original operating system, as you are presently unable to get into your system due to the necessary files being deleted. Unfortunately you will lose anything added since you purchased the system. Shall I walk you through the reload sir?"

Customer: "You mean I paid $2,000 dollars, and I have to reload this myself?" (rants for fifteen minutes, makes death threats and references to being supported by a third world country) "*&@$ing reload! I'll give you a reload!"

Bang! Bang!

Tech Support: "Sir, is everything all right?"

Customer: "Sure is. I just blew the $#%&ing thing to bits with my shotgun you *$@%ing &*%$er."

Tech Support: (taking a satisfying long breath) "Sir, I would like to advise you at this point that gunshot damage is not covered under the terms and conditions of your warranty. May I suggest a servicer in your locality to assist in the reassembly of your machine?"

Customer: "$%!# you."

I dissolved into fits of laughter.

:p

Pretty Hate Machine · 04-22-01, 10:18 PM

Hahahahahahaha!!!

Man, I wish I'd seen that last night...mine was clogged to the gills, couldn't do anything with it...you should've seen the shite that I cleaned out of it

Ailuros · 04-22-01, 10:21 PM

hope you didn't leave it soaking in the bathtub

Pretty Hate Machine · 04-22-01, 10:22 PM

Nah, nothing that silly...I was there picking all the crap out with a pair of tweezers

Ailuros · 04-22-01, 10:29 PM

sequel continued:

Quote:

Customer: "Hello, yes, my system is crushed!"
Tech Support: "Crushed?"
Customer: "Yes, that is what I said, crushed."
Tech Support: "Oh, your system has crashed..."
Customer: "Yes, I cannot do anything, my mouse will not work, and I can't see anything on the screen. I need it fixed now!"
Tech Support: "Ok, I need some history on this problem. What was the last thing you did before the system crashed?"
Customer: "Well, after I stood on the computer to hang a picture, my machine was crushed."
Tech Support: "Oh, so your system has been crushed..."

[ 04-22-2001: Message edited by: ailuros21 ]

Dr. Feelgood · 04-22-01, 10:42 PM

rofl

Good ones.

Tachyon · 03-01-03, 01:55 AM

Priceless_Dabson!~ · 03-01-03, 02:23 AM

Soak in 5 gallons of water!!!!! hahahahahaahaa.....Oh man !! funny........ ""Did you clean the mouse" Oh yes she say's!!

If he would have said : ma'am if you would have used 6 gallons everything would be ok ....But 5 ... only I'm sorry ...can't help you.

Ailuros · 03-01-03, 07:06 AM

God that thread is almost 2 years old. Who the hell dug that up?

Whiggles · 03-01-03, 12:15 PM

http://www.rinkworks.com/stupid/

Funniest site ever.

Flywest · 03-01-03, 03:10 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Tachyon
lol

Blighter · 03-01-03, 03:44 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Flywest

'

damn that pic makes me itch all over

Flywest · 03-01-03, 11:24 PM

Ya want me to scratch ya all over eh ?

04-22-01, 10:07 PM	#2
AMD-Tech Registered User Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Ontario, Canada Posts: 1,751	lmao Just wait till I drag out an old file of funny tech support stories! (as soon as I can find it) __________________ "I had a dream that my house was on fire, people laughed while it burned...."

04-22-01, 10:18 PM	#4
Pretty Hate Machine Registered User Join Date: Aug 2000 Location: Bristol, England. Posts: 18,368	Hahahahahahaha!!! Man, I wish I'd seen that last night...mine was clogged to the gills, couldn't do anything with it...you should've seen the shite that I cleaned out of it __________________ "I AM THE RAMPANT MOOSE!" ~ Trip :D "Wales is to England what Canada is to the US plus sheep" ~ Banana :D "But this past few days id prolly get myself with an asscheek on each" ~ Marianozz :D "Actually it's only 19 inches but it looks huge." ~ 1badjedi :D ~Powered by MintyNip™~

04-22-01, 10:21 PM	#5
Ailuros epsilon+3 Join Date: Oct 2000 Posts: 18,848	hope you didn't leave it soaking in the bathtub __________________ People are more violently opposed to fur than leather, because it's easier to harass rich ladies than motorcycle gangs

04-22-01, 10:22 PM	#6
Pretty Hate Machine Registered User Join Date: Aug 2000 Location: Bristol, England. Posts: 18,368	Nah, nothing that silly...I was there picking all the crap out with a pair of tweezers __________________ "I AM THE RAMPANT MOOSE!" ~ Trip :D "Wales is to England what Canada is to the US plus sheep" ~ Banana :D "But this past few days id prolly get myself with an asscheek on each" ~ Marianozz :D "Actually it's only 19 inches but it looks huge." ~ 1badjedi :D ~Powered by MintyNip™~

03-01-03, 01:55 AM	#9
Tachyon Registered User Join Date: Dec 2001 Location: the dumpster behind WalMart, in Roxboro, NC Posts: 6,426	lol __________________ What reason are we fighting the war in Iraq for this week - Opus COOL INTARWEB FORUAM PICTARS http://boards.slackercentral.com/att...chmentid=10326 http://boards.slackercentral.com/att...achmentid=9358 Albatron PX865PE Pro 2.4B SL6RZ @ 3544Mhz, 1.68v, bong cooled 256MB Kingston ValueRAM @ 197Mhz, 2-2-2

04-22-01, 10:42 PM	#8
Dr. Feelgood Suspended Join Date: Dec 2000 Posts: 7,497	rofl Good ones.

03-01-03, 02:23 AM	#10
Priceless_Dabson!~ Registered User Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Who wants to live forever..... Posts: 4,441	Soak in 5 gallons of water!!!!! hahahahahaahaa.....Oh man !! funny........ ""Did you clean the mouse" Oh yes she say's!! If he would have said : ma'am if you would have used 6 gallons everything would be ok ....But 5 ... only I'm sorry ...can't help you. __________________ Priceless_Dabson!~ SPERM!~~~ Tech support!--> Looks like your! Fck'ed~~~:D~~~~~:)~~~~~~:mad:~~~~ Back to the good old day's of raping and pilaging with my new X800Pro~~~~I say FCK Nvidia!~ LOL The curse of 3Dfx....~ ..................Birdy Num num ...... VIVA LA REVOLUTION! Is back on!!~ ATI IS BACK in me PC!~ P4 3.2 23inch Nec 6 neon blue fans ALL BLACK PC!~ Oh I'm {The legend} EVILQTip on Muti player Castle Wolfenstein...~~ http://www.wolfevilbox.tk/

03-01-03, 07:06 AM	#11
Ailuros epsilon+3 Join Date: Oct 2000 Posts: 18,848	God that thread is almost 2 years old. Who the hell dug that up? __________________ People are more violently opposed to fur than leather, because it's easier to harass rich ladies than motorcycle gangs

03-01-03, 12:15 PM	#12
Whiggles Registered User Join Date: Oct 2001 Location: Glasgow, Scotland Posts: 296	http://www.rinkworks.com/stupid/ Funniest site ever.

03-01-03, 11:24 PM	#15
Flywest Registered User Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: Québec, Canada Posts: 3,440	Ya want me to scratch ya all over eh ?